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Chapter 14: The Bar-B-Que chapter
August 21st, 1994
Will had replaced his red tie with an apron. God, he loved his red apron. He wished he could wear it to the office like a tie?treat his work like a bar-b-que. After all, they weren't that dissimilar - being a boss and being a chef: He'd stroll in with his apron and turn the pressure on to a simmer, getting some sizzling and popping out of his hamburgers as they warmed up; he'd move the patties around the grill so some don't get over cooked, keep track of who gets well done and who stays rare?keeping the fish separated from the sausages and the sausages away from the beef, smothering his employees in thick, red, bar-b-que sauce and slapping them in a bun. Well, there probably were a lot of similarities between bbq chef and boss?but he couldn't think about them right now. That was too much work?and he too busy pitching the woo to his bar-b-que.
He loved bar-b-queing and he, all by himself, was mastering three grills at once?for the fifty or sixty employees chatting and gossiping in the backyard behind him. He couldn't let his cattle starve! They'd need a big feast to last through the winter?and they were hungry after all that pilgrimage. Though he was sweating over the grill, moving and working as fast as he could, perhaps no one else at this bar-b-que was having more fun than he. Will loved bar-b-queing. And, man, did he love his red apron.
Smoke wafted up above his head and migrated like storm clouds of flavour over to the mass grouping of people behind him sipping drinks and munching chips and talking shop in the cool breeze and warm rays of the afternoon. They'd gathered in clusters to talk, like nodes in a network, soaking up the sun and, every now and then, sending out a data packet in search of another conversation or more beer. Everyone was here. Bob from accounting. Art. Tim. Fred, the intern. Fred's dad. Bill. Gene the lawyer. That guy from Synapse games?Will couldn't remember his name at the moment - the guy who knew a lot of stuff. Henry. Henry's wife and his hyper kids?the new baby. Hal from programming. It just went on. He was never really aware of how vast his empire had become until he had to fill up his backyard and their mouths for the bar-b-que. And this was just the Redwood staff!
Above the three grills, set up just outside the back of the house, the blams! and growls of some shoot-em-up game were rolling out from the top floor. Heather had gotten up at 12, an hour before the official start of the Bar-b-que, had breakfast, and then began her endless crusade to rid the earth of zombies - or whatever the goal of this week's game was - on that new KillNet server. Will had gone up just after he lit the bar-b-ques and asked, "Don't you want to come down for the bar-b-que?" She said she was practicing. It was up to her, really. She used to love the bar-b-ques when she was younger, Will lamented.
BLAM! BLAM! SNORT!
Will found it ironic that, at a bar-b-que of over sixty or seventy game-developers, his daughter couldn't be bothered to come down because she was too busy playing games.
"Do you need any help, Will?" came a voice from beside him. It was Wayne, the motorbike riding, hippie manual writer.
"No, that's great Wayne."
"Sure." Wayne turned to go.
"Oh, wait," said Will. "You're a hippie. Do you know anything about veggie burgers?"
"Hmm? No way, man. I'm a red-meat hippie?all the way through."
"Damn." Will was worried about that veggie burger. He'd never cooked one before. He'd only bought one and he didn't want to screw it up. It really looked like a burger?he couldn't believe it was made from vegetables. Where were the vegetables? It looked like slimy meat. It smelled like meat. He had been assured that it tasted like the real thing too?but he wasn't so convinced of that.
"Who ordered the veggie?" asked Wayne.
"Carl. He's not vegetarian?he's on some no-meat doctor-recommended diet."
"Oh. Too bad."
"Yeah," said Will. "At the annual bar-b-que?" he shook his head.
"I guess it's just like a burger?but I imagine it cooks faster," Wayne suggested. "Maybe cook it at the end."
"Yeah," said Will. "I'll try that, put it on one of the cooler spots so it cooks slowl-whoa!!" He felt paws on his back pushing him towards the grill. Turning around he found Barker there, nudging him and pushing him.
"Jeezus. Off his leash again. No! No Barker! Down boy. This meat is for Madre staff. MADRE STAFF ONLY," he shouted and looked stern to drive home the point. Barker chose not to understand. Will waved his rag at him a couple of times. "Shoo! Shoo."
Barker bit onto the rag and growled, pulling and shaking it. "Dammit Barker!" Will laughed. Wayne took Barker by the neck and pulled him away. "I'll go tie him up again."
"Thanks Wayne. I don't know what's up with him. He's been hyper all day. Must be all the people." Wayne led Barker away, Barker shaking his tail and jumping.
Meanwhile, as the burgers were frying on the grill, the young children were frying in the backyard. Kendra found a table umbrella for Kuriko, Henry's half-Japanese wife, to sit under with her newborn daughter. To keep the other kids, who were quickly getting grumpy, from baking she found some of Mark's shorts and unrolled the cover off of the small pool. That seemed to keep them pre-occupied?but she was worried that Dai, Kuriko's youngest son, was getting too hyper. That kid had boundless energy coupled with having newly turned ferocious four. In between all this, Kendra had to run around and find clean glasses, tell people where the bathroom was, etc?etc? She liked the annual bar-b-que?but liked it better when it was at someone else's house. Will always got to do the fun bar-b-queing while she had to make slaw and keep the thing from falling apart. At least seeing everyone obviously enjoying themselves was a comfort.
Art and Bill and Harold from Programming were sitting on three lawn chairs just under the large pine trees drinking beers and laughing. The programmers were all clustered together and as Kendra walked by she could hear them talking about their code-conquering escapades and discussing the merits of one programming language over another, as well as philosophizing on the adjustments that needed to be made to the in-house programming module. They were all drinking Kepsi too, just like at work.
Over by the pool, Henry was chatting it up with Neil and Andrew. He worked with them a lot over in programming getting music placed in the games. They were reminiscing about past Madre bar-b-ques which piqued Henry's interest because this was his first. He'd been hired on just after one and missed the next one because he had been on holidays visiting relatives.
"Man, I remember the juice was really good that one year," continued Neil as he drank his crystallized, faked-fruit powder drink. The powdered drink seemed like something out of a Sci-fi Quest game to Henry, now that he thought about it, like an insta-drink or something. "I remember it was really hot?and there was that Mango Tango drink?or whatever it was?this pure mango puree mix that Phillis had brought back from the Philippines. It was great."
"That was that year with the fridge incident," Andrew commented.
"Oh yeah!" Neil laughed. "Ha. Ha. I remember that. I totally forgot about it."
"The fridge incident?" enquired Henry.
"Oh yes?" said Andrew, "the fridge incident."
"I would like to know more about the fridge incident," Henry stated.
"Art feels better at the Roberts' place. No cats."
Andrew smiled. "Man, after the fridge incident, you'd be afraid of cats too."
"Especially if you were already afraid of cats," Neil nodded.
Andrew laughed and drank his watered powder drink.
"What happened at the fridge incident?"
"Well, I don't know," began Neil. "Starting about?maybe four years ago? I'm not sure exactly, Bob - you know, from accounting - started hosting some of the yearly bar-b-ques at his place?just for a change of scene or whatever. Anyway, Bob has this cat-"
"Mr. Tingle." Andrew interjected with a wry smile.
"That's right. Mr. Tingle. Nice cat, you know, fairly typical. Wanders around the bar-b-que sniffing food, rubbing up against legs, spying, hiding, ignoring, sucking up." Neil took a long sip from his drink as if he were diving down the straw himself and cooling off in tropical waters. "Well, Art is deathly afraid of cats."
"Deathly," emphasised Andrew.
"Really?" asked Henry.
"Oh yeah. Kind of weird, I know?but people have phobias about weirder things?like spiders-"
"Or?toilets."
"At least cats I can understand," continued Neil. "Anyway, Art has his eye on this cat the whole time. Whenever that cat came strolling by Art would get all tense. The cat didn't really notice and Art didn't really care - I don't think he thought about the cat much?just when it was around. Anyway, at one point Art goes to grab another beer out of the fridge - everybody gets their own stuff out of the fridge at Bob's - so people are going in and out of there. Anyway, on the way out he runs into Susan and they start chatting up in front of the doorway inside - well, people have to go in and out of there so someone comes along and she and Art step away. Now, while Art and Susan were talking I guess the cat had snuck up behind Art and sat down. When Art stepped back he stomped on Mr. Tingle's tail."
"Oh my god."
"Art turns around to see this hissing and screaming cat and he freaks. He takes his foot and flings it about a meter and a half into the bushes."
"Oh my god!"
"So Mr. Tingle runs off and-"
"It landed in the water," corrected Andrew.
"What?"
"Yeah. Bob had a wheelbarrow beside the bushes. It had filled with rainwater from the night before and the cat fell into it."
Neil laughed. "Really? Mr. Tingle fell in a wheelbarrow full of rainwater? I didn't see that. Ha ha. Man, that cat must have been pissed!"
They all laughed.
"So the cat runs off," Neil continued, "Art is a little jittered but mostly fine. Mr. Tingle doesn't come back for the rest of the day?just goes somewhere and hides?much to Art's relief. Art feels kind of guilty about the cat and apologizes to Bob. Bob feels kind of guilty about Art. Anyway, Bob says the cat's been in worse fights with the neighbouring felines and the only thing hurt was its pride. So Art feels better and the BBQ goes on just fine."
Neil slurped on his space beverage.
"Hey, they're serving up. Let's go get a seat," said Neil. They nodded and all three headed towards one of the tables set out on the lawn and sat down at one end together. Henry looked cautiously over to the other end of the table. The sound effects guy had removed the top bun from his hamburger and was tapping on it with his carrot stick, his head down low to discern the sound made. He switched to a spoon and then to tapping it with the underside of his glass full of orange juice. He seemed to really like the orange juice/burger combination as a big grin came across his face and he kept doing it. God, that guy was strange.
"So the next year the BBQ is at Will's house," continued Neil, "No cat, no problem. Everyone has a great time. Art's not afraid of dogs. It's just dandy. But the next year it's held at Bob's house again. And I don't see the cat ANYWHERE. Art, I think, totally forgot that Bob even had a cat. Anyway, so I go in to get a drink and notice the cat is on top of the refrigerator, kind of hidden back there. The poor thing is just not interested in coming out this year.
Andrew laughed at some unforeseen punch line, quenching his giggle with cool insta-drink.
"Anyway, so the party goes on as normal. But, about half an hour later we all suddenly hear this high pitched scream coming from the house. We turn around and Art comes running blindly out of the house waving his arms and he has this cat wrapped around his head?just clawing onto him."
"Jesus Christ," said Henry.
"Before anyone can react Art throws it off and the cat runs around to the back of the house and disappears," Andrew finished.
"Poor Art, he has no hair so his nice chrome dome is all scratched up and a little bloody. Nothing serious at all, but he's real spazzed out. Eventually he calms down, though. Anyway, I guess a lot of other people had seen the cat up on the fridge too. Someone saw it happen. When Art came in to grab a beer the cat started wiggling its butt and then just leapt on his head. It had just been waiting there for Art. This cat planned a revenge and waited not one, but TWO years to get back at Art. That's nuts."
Andrew was laughing. Mr. Tingle, the attacking cat, he could never get over that story.
Henry smiled, but felt sympathy for Art. "Poor Art. He's such a good natured guy."
"Yeah, but he got over it pretty quick. Knowing Art he'll probably put that in his next game."
Will slipped hamburgers onto the table in front of them and Henry dug in. It was really delicious. Will's reputation as a grill master had not been exaggerated.
Over by the corner of the yard Barker was staring woefully at the people eating delicious, red meat.
"I've got that veggie burger cooking now," Will informed Carl. Carl was looking forward to it. Because of his doctor's diet he couldn't even munch on chips. He was looking for something to go with his coleslaw. He didn't want to be left out of the great burger bonanza of '94.
Meanwhile, in the kitchen, Kendra was?
GET BAR-B-QUE SAUCE
There is none.
They'd only finished about two-thirds of the requested burgers and they were already out of bar-b-que sauce. She had to think.
GET KETCHUP
Good idea! Reaching into the fridge you pull out a bottle of the red stuff.
GET MAYONNAISE
Check! You now have a bottle of mayonnaise.
COMBINE MAYONNAISE WITH KETCHUP
You now have a nice, pink mix.
TAKE MIX TO GRILL
Naw. It's not ready yet.
ADD VINEGAR, MUSTARD AND SPICES TO MIX
Mixing the three ingredients together you get an interesting concoction that, at first taste, puts the store bought sauce to shame. You receive 10 self-confidence points.
Kendra delivered the sauce to Will and found a free spot on the end of one table to sit down to her own burger. At the other end of the table Tim was shooting the breeze with Ron of HomoSapien Quest.
"How's your latest coming?" asked Ron. Partly due to the location of their office Ron and Laura Johansen were kind of the odd couple out of the company designers. Unlike the others, they'd been hired explicitly to design a game rather than moving up from lower positions. Their office, for one, was decorated with African antiques and wall hangings from Morocco. It was not unusual to find the husband and wife team burning incense in there. Sometimes strange hums could be heard coming from down that end of the office. They usually kept tight lips on their game development, sometimes seeming to disappear for months in the midst of their creation cycle, emerging later as if from a coma trying to find out what everyone else was up to. They were much loved by the rest of the Madre team, partly because they sometimes seemed to come from another world.
"It's going great," said Tim. "We've got all the plot and dialogue sorted out. Maps of the game screens are done and some character sketches. It's going to be great to see a game with the new digitized graphics?it still blows me away to see these sketches and think that that's what you will see on the screen. I still can't believe how good HSQ3 (HomoSapien Quest 3) looks."
"Yeah. We did a lot of great stuff playing with the graphics. My number one favourite thing is that when your character moves further away on the screen?he actually gets smaller. Such a small detail, but adds so much. It allowed us to expand the fighting system and put in a lot more sight gags, you know? And we totally got to capture the feeling of the endless dunes of a Saharan landscape?"
"Man," said Tim. "You must be tired. You just finished shipping everything Friday, right?" It had been a really busy month since Will had posted the BBQ notice on his office door. Time had just flown by.
"Yeah. We were up until 4am packing that jazz up. It was tough because we had to cram an extra disk into the box. Disk #9 is pretty much just a bug patch disk! Of course it doesn't say that on the disk, though." Ron held his hands up to his lips in a 'shhhhh' motion and laughed. Tim smiled. He wasn't looking forward to shipping. It was such a hassle - especially now with their strict adherence to ship dates.
"So when does HSQ3 officially hit stores?"
"Monday," Ron said.
"Wow. Nervous?"
"Nah, man. The last two, like, sold really well. And I think the improved graphics will really help the sales, you know? Even before people play the game. Anyway, pre-orders have been good and we've almost broke even on that alone so I'm not too worried. I just hope people like it, you know? Reviews will start coming in at the end of the week?so I'm all excited about that."
Tim thought about it. He couldn't believe they were going to be shipping their fifth Sci-Fi Quest game in the late spring. It seemed like only yesterday they had pitched the original idea to Will. He hoped that new guy from HQ wouldn't complain too much about the ad-spoofs in the game. That Newman guy didn't seem to know much about games?which could be good or bad. Maybe, if he didn't care enough to learn about the content, he wouldn't catch wind of any ad spoofs until the game shipped?. But if someone complained, he also might crack down on that sort of stuff really hard, not understanding the gaming mentality. Ah well, thought Tim, they were just going to do what they did best and if Will or Newman didn't like it, that was that.
BWWWAAAAANNNNNHHHH!!!!!
There was crying beside them. Tim looked over to see Kuriko hushing her newborn child.
"Sssshhh. Ssssh, now. Nakanaide." She bopped the child up and down on her knee. The child quieted.
"How old is she?" Sheila, Tim's girlfriend, asked.
"Only one month." Kuriko rocked the baby a bit more and, pulling a bottle out of her purse, began to feed the child. "Thank goodness it's another girl. I think we went disastrously wrong with our one boy."
Tim was about to say something when suddenly a young girl beside him was tugging on Kuriko's sleeve. "Mom. Mom. Jason is spraying ketchup on his fries from four feet away."
"Yes. Yes," Kuriko said, pre-occupied with the child. "You don't have to tell me every bad thing that Jason does. Mommy only has so much care in her."
"He's getting it all over the table and chairs," she said.
Kuriko sighed and rolled her eyes at Sheila and Tim as if to say, "I rest my case."
"Ok, go tell your father, ok?"
"Ok." And Henrietta ran off to the next table. All three of them watched Henrietta talk to Henry and Henry get up to go reign in his child.
"Big police sister, huh?" said Tim.
"Don't you know it. She's always on his case?she gets to play the part of the adult now and she loves it. HE, on the other hand plays a great crook. The dynamic is ten times more stressful. I'm worried what throwing a third into it will do."
"How old is Jason?" asked Tim.
"Four."
"Ah," said Sheila. "That explains a lot." Sheila looked at Tim if only to drive home the point that she didn't want kids.
"Yes," Kuriko agreed. "The worst thing is his grandma sends him over all these tapes from Japan. Kid's cartoons. Have you ever heard of Shin-chan?"
Both of them shook their heads no.
"Oh, well. It's this really popular cartoon in Japan about this four year old little boy. He's always getting into trouble - wants to be an adult, but is always getting into trouble. And his mom is always shouting Ikimasen! Ikimasen! Which means, 'Don't even think about it!' It's really funny. Adults quite like it too."
Tim laughed. "Ikimasen! I'll have to remember that."
"Anyway, Shin-chan is always mooning people. Well, now my son thinks this is a cool/funny thing to do and is constantly pulling down his pants and mooning people. It's been really hard beating it out of him?but at least he's stopped quite a bit."
They all looked at the daughter on Kuriko's knee and each wondered to themselves what sort of terror she would cause. Tim found it hilarious that mild mannered Henry had such wild kids.
Meanwhile, back at the grill, Will was putting the finishing touches on his last batch of burgers. Almost everybody had been fed?and there wasn't much chance of people wanting seconds (Will made big burgers). He stacked the last twenty or so patties on a plate and set it on the table behind him to remove the sausages. When he turned around to set the plate of sausages down both his hands were full (the left with a flipper) which is why he couldn't do anything about what happened next.
"BARKER!!!" he yelled as the dog, already moving at full speed leaped up onto the table in front of him, grabbed a patty in his mouth and took off across the yard. Quickly putting down his stuff Will ran after the dog. "BARKER!" he yelled. But the dog was gone and Will, irritated, went back to his plate. At least he'd only got one, Will thought.
Then Will picked up the hamburger plate and then noticed that the veggie burger was gone. THE FUCKING DOG ATE THE VEGGIE BURGER!! It came for meat and it took the only frigging veggie burger there was! ARRG! That stupid dog! It couldn't even steal a burger properly! Will had spent so much time on the veggie burger getting it right, worrying about it, poking and prodding it, flipping it until it was the right color and texture? It was so infuriatingly ironic. It was more than that, it was ironical! And how was he going to explain this to Carl. At that moment Will was the most unhappy person at that bar-b-que. But it was soon about to be Carl.
"Carl," Will put his hand on Carl's shoulder.
"Yeah?" Carl turned around, sick of munching on coleslaw and eagerly anticipating the veggie burger Will had promised. He was perplexed by Will's empty hands.
"About that veggie burger..."
"Yeah?" Carl still held out hope that Will was going to ask 'How would you like it done?"
"Uhh, the dog ate it." Will felt like a kid explaining where his homework had gone.
Carl's face drooped, followed by his body. "Oh."
"I'm sorry."
Carl sighed. "That's ok, I guess. I'll just have some more slaw." He turned back to his plate with the small section portioned out for slaw and began eating the pitiful, green, droopy vegetable mix. Will felt really bad.
Beside Carl, Bill and Gene, Madre's resident lawyer, were talking.
"You know that the guys from EGO software just started selling their game engine a few months ago."
"Game engine?" asked Gene. He was a lawyer. He wasn't aware games had engines.
"You know, the programming code that powers the whole thing. It's like our Madre Creative Interpreter?that we make all the games with. Anyway, they've actually sold theirs to another company."
"Really? That's unusual. Proprietary software. I'd tell a company to hold onto the rights for that stuff with dear life," remarked Gene.
"I know. But they sold it?not their brand new one, mind you, but Clayburn's older Gloom 1 one. Guess how much it sold for? $140,000 just to develop with it. They've sold four licenses already. 560,000 dollars! Man, these guys are making more money selling the engine to their game than selling the actual game! It's nuts. And most of these guys testicles haven't even dropped yet! They're geniuses?or prodigies or something?not to mention filthy rich!"
Gene pretended to be impressed. He didn't know exactly what Bill was talking about. He didn't know prices much either. He knew litigation - also known as the Sci-Fi Quest series. Still, 560,000 dollars in a few months?he'd heard Gloom 1 was a major hit?but still, that was a lot of money to make a copy of Gloom 1. Maybe instead of law, he should have gotten into the video game business, Gene thought.
Meanwhile, Will had gone upstairs to see if his daughter wanted to come down - maybe she had forgotten - you know how time passes and the world disappears when you're playing those games?he'd seen his employees do it while at work. But as he neared her door he heard her voice. Wondering whether, in her video game gusto, she was talking to the computer, Will sheepishly snuck nearer and listened at the door. Pretty soon he could tell she was talking to someone on the phone?but he stayed and listened anyway.
"It's probably going to get shut down," Heather said.
"Oh?" came Carol's voice on the other end.
"It's lost so much money, and now it's losing popularity."
"Really? But it seemed so popular."
"Well, do you use it anymore?"
"Yeah?but not much, I guess."
"Anyway, they sunk so much money into SupraNet to establish it. And for the first few years it just lost money because nobody was ready for the world's first on-line community. So even though they've been the only and most popular net for the last 2 years, they've only made back half of what they sank into it. Madre did more favours for the Internet and Internet population than for themselves."
"That's too bad."
"Yeah. I guess," said Heather, cracking her wrists. They got sore sometimes after a lot of playing. "SupraNet was great. But as a business venture is was not so successful. Anyway, my parents haven't said anything about officially shutting it down?but you can tell. I don't know what else they're going to do with it."
There was a pause in the conversation.
"Is your computer rebooted yet?" Heather asked. They had taken a break when Carol needed to reboot - but Carol had phoned Heather to talk during the interim few minutes. Mostly they wanted to talk about the last Killnet round?and how their all-girl clan was doing on the competition ladder. In a way they were surprised they had lasted this long?and in a way they were not. They were one of two girl gaming clans?and there was a good chance they were going to make it to the semi-final competition this weekend.
"Ok, great!" Carol confirmed from the other end of the line.
"Let's shoot up some zombies."
"All play and no play makes poor results on Killnet," Carol quipped.
"Ok, see you in a bit." Heather hung up and went for her computer.
Will, fearing he might get caught standing outside, quickly slipped back down the stairs to the kitchen. About ten minutes later, after Carl had eaten about as much coleslaw as he could stand he felt the familiar hand on his shoulder again. It was Will. And he had a big sandwich on a plate for him.
"I'm really sorry about the burger, Carl," Will said. "I made you up a special order."
Carl looked at it. It was a big sandwich. It looked really good. His face beamed. "Thanks! That's great!" He took it and chowed down, obviously enjoying himself. Will felt better. Now that everyone was satisfied he could finally feed himself. Taking off his apron he found a spot on the porch and began to feast proudly on a burger with flavours only a red apron could produce.
Above, the sun continued its slow, relentless roll across the sky, now dipping closer to the house. It was still hot out. Over the next hour, the guests shifted, sat, digested, chatted, scattered and regrouped and went in and out of the house as the shadows on the ground slowly elongated. Around four Kendra started bringing out pieces of cake for people who were interested in desert.
Kumiko waved hers away. She had been quite filled by the enormous hamburger only an hour or so ago. And she was quite enjoying her wine; that was her kind of desert. Henry had their daughter now and it was her break time which she used to chat it up with some other video game widows by the pool. There was a tug on her sleeve.
"Mom. Mom."
"What is it now Henrietta?" Kuriko was getting annoyed with this.
"Jason is doing something bad."
"I don't want to know about it," she replied and turned her head back to the women. The tug came again, more insistent this time.
"He's doing something really bad, mom."
Kuriko looked down at her daughter again?and gave in. "Alright. What is he doing?"
Henrietta looked cautiously at the two ladies and then back at her mother. "Something bad," she repeated and pointed towards the bushes. This worried Kuriko - if her daughter didn't want to say what he was doing in front of the other guests, it must be bad. Kuriko turned her head towards where her daughter was pointing. A few moments ago there had been a large cluster of people there talking and chatting. Now they seemed to be dissipating?or at least stepping slowly away from the bushes. Some were looking at the bush behind them, perplexed. Whatever was bugging them, it seemed to be breaking up the conversation.
"Excuse me for a moment, won't you?" Kuriko asked her guests, not yet embarrassed, but feeling that any moment she could be. They nodded and Kuriko moved towards the group of people. As she neared she became aware of a rather nasty odor. Careful not to let the people in the group see her, Kuriko broke past the pungent smell and squeezed herself into the bushes. It took her a few moments for her eyes to adjust to the light?while her nose reeled in the powerful smell. Somehow, she recognized it. And as the edges of the darkness began to sharpen she saw her son standing there looking up at her?shock on his face?looking very guilty. And there, beside him on the ground was a little brown coiled-up roll. He'd taken a DUMP in the bushes!!
Kuriko freaked. "N-N-nande?! Nande toire ni ikinakatta yo!!!?? Koo-iu wa mokoto ni dame desu yo!!!" But as she yelled at him, his face grew hard and he insolently turned his back on her. This infuriated her?but before she realized what was going on he had moved his hands to his pants.
"IKIMASEN!!!!!" The words trembled to her lips like the shudders from a violent volcano but it was already too late. By the time those fierce words erupted in a violent flush of parental lava heard across the yard her son had dropped his drawers and was mooning her.
Kuriko was immobilized by her fury for a moment - in which time Jason took the opportunity to pull his pants back up and bolt out of the bushes. She tore off after him, careful not to step into his 'deposit.'
"Anata!!! Matte yo!! Maaaatttteeeeeeee!!!!" she yelled as she tore off down the backyard after him. Henry, watching all this from the other side of the yard, pretended he was in another world. A world in which he didn't know these two, let alone was related to them. A world in which he was happy.
Will didn't notice this commotion as he chatted with the two guys from Synapse on his patio. He was more pre-occupied with a change in the air. Suddenly it had cooled, almost imperceptibly so, and the sun had dipped behind the house. The lawn took on a darker shade of green and they were all swimming in a light shadow. The wind had picked up slightly. And there was that familiar smell: A hollow, wholesome, earthy smell. A few leaves, still green, fell from the trees in the wind. But it was the smell that gave it away for Will. Autumn was coming. It would still be several weeks away, but like a native with his ear to the ground, Will had heard it coming. Their bar-b-que had sent summer out with a bang.
Not long after that people started leaving. Typically, this was when Heather decided to join the party, sneaking out to the food table and picking on the scrap vegetables and chips there, eating her cake and chips at the same time as if they were all part of a well balanced meal. She talked with a few of the people there?some of the ones she felt more comfortable with?and some of the ones that liked her. Then she hung out with her mom for a bit and helped bring stuff inside. She told Kendra about this wicked battle she had just had on KillNet. Kendra listened sympathetically?but her mind was playing its own games: Mystery Quest? Horror Quest? Mother Quest? Money Quest? Will could hardly believe that Heather had been up there in her room this whole time?shooting things. There'd been a couple of nice teenage boys here at the party?maybe she could have met them?ah, but they would have been still too young for her. As a business man he tried to make addictive games - but as a father he was a little disturbed at the amount of time his daughter was spending in front of the machine.
Around five thirty the backyard started clearing out. Will found himself, more and more, near the front door saying good-bye, sending people home with extra food and best wishes for the end of their weekend. Will wished Fred the intern, who was on his last week at Madre and despite offers to keep him on was continuing with plans to travel around the world and become a journalist, good luck and told him he was always welcome back at Madre. Gene, Bill, Henry, Fred, Shane, Andrew, Neil and their girlfriends, friends and wives too were all shown off in typical Roberts' style.
After the bush incident, Kuriko had been itching to get out of there. Her and Henry waited until the earliest possible moment where it wouldn't seem rude to leave and left. Which was too bad, because they both had really enjoyed themselves? until?well, you know.
Kuriko was glad that the Roberts' dog had acted up. It seemed to make her son's contribution to the afternoon's entertainment less unforgivable. As she and Henry were leading their kids out to the car a couple of guys from her husband's work were talking in front of them.
"Man, did you see the size of a dump that dog took behind the bushes?!"
"No way, man. That stank so bad. I couldn't go near it."
"Man, that veggie burger must've gone right through 'im."
Kuriko was burning up with embarrassment?but simultaneously relieved that people seemed to think it was the dog. At least she had some hope of living down the humiliation.
By six-thirty the sun had totally hidden itself behind the house, but the clouds had disappeared, bathing the back lawn in a comfortable, golden light. Only the dedicated and close friends remained now - Art, Geoff, Wayne, Bill and a few others - casually chatting on the deck, revisiting the cake and the wine. Will sat on the back porch with his wife for a while and they talked?no longer feeling obliged to be helpful hosts. This sort of party could take care of itself.
"It's Fall," Kendra said.
"Yeah."
"I like this smell."
"Me too."
They sipped their wine together. Mark joined them for a while on the patio but found them boring and went back inside to read comics. Heather hung around the remaining guests and listened in on their conversations, chatting with Art for a while.
As more guests disappeared Will got back to cleaning up the yard, washing down the grill and tossing paper plates. Will paused as the soft summer wind blew around him, It had been a great bar-b-que. It had lived up to its status as the great summer bar-b-que?despite coming so late this year. In fact, despite everything - like Barker stealing the only veggie burger only to purge it in the woods - it had been great. And even if they never had a bar-b-que again?this one would have made it all worth it.
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